Space...The Low Orbit Frontier

I agree that the ISS is boring and expensive, but I disagree that we haven’t learned much. Sure, we didn’t discover “breakfast beverage crystals” , ICMBs or anything cool like they got in the 50’s, but we are learning a lot about living and surviving in outer space. We are learning about the physiology of living in zero-g, fixing crap while wearing a space suit, etc. This is all stuff that we need to know for long term living in space.

Still, I want more and faster. I want the new space shuttle yesterday. They should have scrapped the “current” model after Challenger in 1987 and started fresh. I’d rather see a 5 year manned-trip hiatus than to pour money down the shuttle’s 1970’s rendered gullet. Ever wonder why the main fuel tank’s orange color is eerily familiar? That’s right it’s the same color as your living room carpet or beanbag chair! (No I’m not pedophile; these are the sites that come up on Goggle images…like this hideous combined orange shag-carpet beanbag chair, but I digress.) I want the government to at lest triple NASA’s budget and develop at least two different launch vehicles using modern technology and materials. I want to go back to the Moon and build a base. At the same time we should be building and testing Mars capable ships. I want to get launched into space for a few days so I proudly wear a T-shirt stating “I’ve puked in outer space”

Unfortunately, the Republicans would rather spend money on big new drug entitlements for our beloved seniors and…well…the Democrats want to spend even more money on bigger drug entitlements for everyone and put drug companies out of business to boot. Don’t forget the pork important infrastructure improvements including ever important federal interstate highway scenic covered bridges (well I made that last bit up, their not actually highway covered bridges, well not anymore, maybe 50-100 years ago they were considered highways but they aren’t highway highways, but I digress…again). Don’t forget the Helium and mohair subsidies, and personally I would rather take money out of the hands of agribusiness and into the hands of the aerospace industry. Agriculture is sooo yesterday and space is tomorrow.

Maybe we aren’t “stuck” in low earth orbit, maybe we are trapped. Maybe the moon landings were faked, or Buzz Aldrin and Neil Armstrong died or went insane or became a threat to mankind and had to be killed upon return and were replaced by doubles created by the Illuminati or pentavaret. Maybe we are launching monkey after monkey from the ISS in hopes to understand what happened and PETA would go insane if they knew so NASA is all “nothing to see here folks, just boring science”. Then there are the aliens, but I digress...